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第8章在行路中遇见自己（7）
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about1904，myfatherrentedaalakeiookusallthereforthemonthofAugust.WeallgwormfromsomekittensandhadtorubPoonourarmsaandm，andmyfatherrolledoverihallhis;butoutsideofthatthevawasasudfromthenonnohoughttherelatheworldlikethatlakeiurersummer—alwaysonAugust1stforoh.Ihavesi-waterman，butsometimesiherearedayswhelesshetidesandthefearfulcoldoftheseawaterandtheiacrosstheafternoonandintotheeveningmakemewishfortheplacidityofalakeinthewoods.AfewweeksagothisfeelinggIboughtmyselfacoupleofbasshooksandaspiurhelakewhereweusedtogo，foraweek’sfishingaoldhaunts.
Itookalongmyson，whohadneverhadaeruphisnoseandwhohadseenlilypadsonlyfromtrainwindows.OnthejourhelakeIbegawouldbelike.Iwoimewouldhavemarredthisuhisholyspot—thedstreams，thehillsthatthesuhedthepathsbehindthecamps.IwassurethetarredroadwouldhavefounditoutandIwootherwaysitwouldbedesolated.Itisstrangehowmuemberaboutplaceslikethatonceyouallowyourmiothegrooveswhichleadbaberohing，andthatsuddenlyremindsyou.IguessIrememberedclearestofalltheearlyms，whenthelakewasotionless，rememberedhowthebedroomsmelledofthelumberitwasmadeofawoodswhosesteredthroughthes.Thepartitionsinthecampwerethinanddidehetopoftherooms，andasIwasalwaysthefirstupIwoulddresssoftlysoasnottowaketheothers，aothesweetoutdoorsandstartouttheoe，keepiheshoreinthelongshadowsofthepines.Irememberbeingveryevertorubmypaddleagainstthegunwaleforfearthestillhecathedral.
Thelakehadyouwouldcallawildlake.Thererinkledaroundtheshores，anditwasinfarmingtryalthoughtheshoreofthelakewerequiteheavilywooded.Someofthecottageswereownedbynearbyfarmers，andyouwouldliveattheshoreayourmealsatthefarmhouse.That’swhatourfamilydid.Butalthoughitasafairlylargeandundisturbedlakeandtherewereplaitwhich，toachildatleast，seemedieandprimeval.
Iwasrightaboutthetar:itledtowithinhalfamileoftheshore.ButwhenIgotbackthere，withmyboy，aoaearafarmhouseandintothekindofsummertimeIhadknown，Icouldtellthatitwasgoiymuchthesameasithadbeenbefore—Ik，lyihefirstm，smellingthebedroom，aheboysandgooffalongtheshoreinaboat.IbegantosustaintheillusionthathewasI，andtherefore，bysimpletransposition，thatIwasmyfather.Thisseed，keptgupallthetimewewerethere.Itwasirelyigrewmuger.Iseemedtobelivingadualexistence.Iwouldbeinthemiddleofsomesimpleact，Iwouldbepigupabaitbdownatablefork，orIwouldbesayihing，awouldbenotIbutmyfatherwhowassayingthewthegesture.Itgavemeasation.
&fishim，Ifeltthesamedampmthewormsidsawthedragonflyalightoipofmyrodasithoveredafewihesurfaceofthewater，itwasthearrivalofthisflythatebeyondanydoubtthateverythingwasasitalwayshadbeen，thattheyearswereamirageandtherehadbeehesmallwaveswerethesame，gtherowboatuheaswefishedatandtheboatwasthesameboat，thesamecreenandtheribsbrokeninthesamepladerthefloor，boardsthesamefresh-waterleavihedeadhellgrammite，thewispsofmoss，therustydiscardedfishhook，thedriedbloodfromyesterday’scatch.Westaredsilentlyatthetipsofourrods，atthedragodweipofmihewater，tentatively，pensivelydislodgingthefly，whichdartedtoised，dartedtwofeetbadcametaiheruptherod.Therehadbeeweenthedugonflyaheroastofmemory.Ilookedattheboy，whowassilentlywatghisfly，anditwasmyhandsthatheldhisrod，myeyeswatg.Ifeltdizzyanddidn’tknowwhichrodIwasattheendof.
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